Allen Here: Archive

TUMBLR! I FORGOT!

I forgot about this place.

Nov 4th

Dear Guy Next To Me In Yoga Class Wearing A...

What were you thinking?

Feb 5th

Feb 1st

1 note

Who’s excited for The Magic of Ordinary Days???

Jan 30th

Jan 17th

Baby Boy Got Some Press (and speaks in run ons) →

Jan 12th

1 note

Jan 7th

Jan 6th

Changes on 1 to 10 scale for 2010

1 hereinafter shall be Pink (who sucks). 5 hereinafter shall be Patricia Richardson (who really deserves a comeback, no?). 10 hereinafter shall be Portia de Rossi (who rocks). 11 is Lady Gaga. Period. Questions?

Jan 5th

Dec 31st

Dec 29th

Dec 19th

Watch

Precious Moments Parody Video. SPOILER if you haven’t seen the movie.

Dec 6th

1 tag

Nov 11th

Physical Changes

My part changed sides all on its own this morning. I’ll keep you aprised of any other changes, hair or otherwise.

Nov 3rd

Oct 27th

Important Question

What is that disorder called when you key your own car? You just key it, and key it, and key it. What is that called?

Oct 19th

Tales From A College Friend On JDate

A single and childless buddy is grabbing drinks tonight with a young lady he met on JDate. In advance of the date, he wrote her, “Is it okay if I bring my kid? My wife has to work that night.” Good one, [NAME REDACTED].

Oct 14th

Oct 7th

1 note

“Anything you do has a still point. When you are in that still point, you can...”

– Joseph Campbell

Oct 7th

Just What's Going On, You Know?

I’m a little tired today. I’m excited about the new sheets on my bed, which sheets make me feel like a real adult. I put up a FB Event this morning to advertise my one man show (Hi There, With Allen Loeb) that is going up on October 21 at 6:30pm at UCB, tickets for which can be reserved at http://losangeles.ucbtheatre.com/shows/1693. On a related note, I am happy with the picture I...

Oct 7th

On Me (post requested by Tova Kaplan)

I’m more handsome than pretty, but more unique than anything else.

Oct 1st

Sep 26th

Road Hope

I got cut off this morning on the 10 by a stupid Ford Fiesta (or maybe it was a Whatever Fit — either way I got cut off by a really shitty, dumb car whose driver shouldn’t be cutting anyone off, let alone me in my rad Mustang convertible (said in an affected tone)). And, I was really pissed off…until I saw the Obama/Biden sticker the car still sported nearly a year after the...

Sep 23rd

A Musing

I’m with Anna. I’d like a better backhand as well. (Also, like she surely is, I too am sad about Roger’s loss yesterday.)

Sep 15th

I'm Quotable

“Awkward is my comfort zone.” - Allen Loeb 2009

Sep 14th

For One Week Only!!!

Hello “fans”! I am this week’s Funny or Die featured blogger. I’ll be giving out tips all week long on how you can be more like me. Intrigued? You’re smart to be. Check it out: http://www.funnyordie.com/allenhere/blog Whatever.

Aug 31st

GGM's Words of Wisdom

In the end, it is impossible not to become what others believe you are. & I’ve always said jealousy knows more than truth does. Both by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Both from Memories of My Melancholy Whores.

Aug 24th

Aug 22nd

Aug 15th

Whatever1

Strictly FYI, I am king of typing a “1” instead of a “!” in IM conversations. Is it nice to be king of something? Yes. Would I rather be king of something else? Probably.

Aug 14th

Aug 13th

Swim Fan

I’ve just heard that there might be a mermaid in Israel. If you see her, please let her know that I am looking to buy upwards of 20 thingamabobs.

Aug 12th